Sunday, December 04, 2005

BaD tHiNgS aGaIn....

Today my mood very dull… and very down… After listen to my best partner.. I feel very angry + disappointed + sad….. I dono how to describe tat feeling… just very ‘em dai’ only… I know I was wrong, but isn’t he also was wrong also? Luckily, I don go to church when my exam… if not… I will surely be smashed… means tat I cannot concentrate my tension in exam time… I am not trying to giving excuse to skip the youth fellowship… I just want to avoid the criticize from tat fellow… who was very YELLOW ship everytime… If I heard the criticize from him… I will trying myself to think over again… Is it the things he say is true? Or he simply say only… then I will become very confuse… because I will look through the problem… So, isn’t it I skip the youth fellowship is the best choice? And 1 more, I just want to pay my fully attention in my study~ because I cannot play ma, this year will decide whether I will STPM or college…

This year… my final year… SPM year… was already giving me a big big pressure… plus more the youth feloowship’s president… preesure + pressure… haiz~ dono how to say… I know I have no leadership, but I am also trying to do well… to help, to done the best.. From the beginning of the year, nothing had happened. I know that there are some quarrelsome in our committee member. But I try to ignore it. Then, the problem was become very seriously. Until I also get into it. Now I were very suffering, whether I want to continue, or I want to quit myself, just stand at the side to look them working hard? Har? I had no better answer.

I haven’t mention today’s incident. Last night, I went to my aunt’s wedding party. So I do not go to church. I thought pui yeen haven’t did the decoration of the church, so I decided from today, I will trying my best to help her, just like last year Lieh Wei was trying hard to help me.. so, I went to church today at 10 morning.. when I step into the church, I was quite surprise, I saw some decoration on the wall. “Oh, pui yeen started to decorate already”, I noticed. After that, when she came, I asked her. “Not me, is YELLOW guy did 1”, she replied. Oh! I am very surprise on that because I thought that he and Zayne are incharge at outsider decoration. So, I ask pui yeen to ask him wether the side decoration think liao ma. Then! The most I hated de answer appear from that YELLOW guy…. (I also heard some only, not very clear) “If I did not start to do, who will start, then finally also will ask me to do”,”Call him not to come already because I scare the decoration he did will not match the things I did it now”, “call him incharge the funny show”, “This year who were sitting exam 1 very ‘DAI SAI’”….. I want to slap him if I am not controlling myself… Then pui yeen ask him, who will did the funny show? He replied,” Neh! The people who are very free after the exam…..” Wah! I really be3 tahan, no one call him to do la, he want to do himself…. Waihai! I did not (re)3 him, he dare to say like that.. make me very angry meh! I was angry because why last year he did not show his kepo, but this year he did!

Poh Chin told me before, YELLOW guy actually is a good guy, he is very concern about the people.. Oh my God.. why I did not mention this in his personality? Or YELLOW guy only good with the ladies more than a man? But he was very good with Waylon, Zayne and Liek Choon o…. After he scolded me, we have a last meeting for this year’s committee member. I was shocked because Zayne looks like very no syok with me… But anyway, I already known, because he and YELLOW guy just like a pair of brothers ma… I really regret why I did not solve the quarrelsome that we make from the beginning of the year. But now are to late already.. okloh! Nevermind. From next year onward, I will not appear on your eye sight anymore, I will not going to meet you anymore, I will not be your friends anymore. I will not remember you anymore… and last word, I HATE YOU.

Last time I hate you because you scolded me, but now I hate you is because of your personality.. So, YELLOW guy. Hope next year you will bring the church up, you will make more member of youth fellowship, Hope God will bless you….